Nerd

The second day of the audit went very smoothly. Part of this is due to the great staff that we have in the lab and the remaining may be attributed to the fantastic personality and attitude of the auditor. She was excellent! She made it clear that she was there to help, not to appoint blame. Very refreshing and certainly not the norm. Still, I wish that this was not so stellar. I want all of the dirty laundry that I don't know about out in the open because other auditors will dig much deeper (because they will have the time to, Charlotte was only here for a day and a half). For now the chaos is over and we will tell ourselves again that we should just keep the house clean this time so next time company comes over it is not so difficult to prepare (fingers crossed Kahler and I can do this).

This audit made it seem as if I really am just filling a position that they say they have and that I really do not have so much to contribute to the project. The staff did a wonderful job of responding to the inquiries of the auditor. I have much to learn from all of them. It is strange to be in this position of ignorance and authority. For me, it is pointless to try and hide the naivety as it will surely be found out. I ask questions about what the staff do yet, I some how have the final say and they come to me for permission to run a given test.

This brings me to the blog title. This realization that i am not well learned in the specifics of the testing that is going on all around me everyday drives a desire to learn everything about all of the processes that I might have something valuable to bring to the table in the way of advice or setting guidelines. I want to know everything about what others are doing and do all that I can to learn from the experiences of those that have gone before. I want to contribute to the body of knowledge dedicated to this virus and disease.

A killer bonus to this endeavor is the possibility of being granted a scholarship to present my findings at conferences in new and exciting places (Vienna, Geneva, New Delhi...). I know that probably sounds crazy as I am currently in a new and exciting place... but here is the thing (it is not only because I am afraid of commitment). I am in a very new and different place however, it seems only to whet the appetite for travel. getting excused leave from the project for a week and being put up in a five star hotel to present my ideas among the subject's best and most influential is exciting no matter where you are. I am going to be working on that. If anyone has any big ideas please shoot them to me.

I have begun to recognize the objective of the project is to build laboratory technicians (by this I mean that we provide excellent training and crap for salaries) and prestige for the professor/s at Emory that procure the grant funding for the project. It is a pretty legit notch in the belt to say that you head an HIV project in Lusaka, Zambia working with clinical vaccine trials and preventative counseling. Some where along the line the original outset is found; that is to limit the impact of this infection among Zambians and ultimately the the rest of the world. From where I am I do not see the latter so clearly. It could be that I have not yet gathered information from enough angles or that the lab is just too disconnecting from the client-counselor interface to see the effect.

I have officially moved into flat four and am enjoying the luxuries of a closet and my own bathroom thoroughly. It is exciting to change perspective if only by a hundred feet or so.

A little peak at the view from one of the little stone paths at Lake Kariba Inn

This is the very same path that I saw the death dragon on... I am driving this point because there have been several to express doubt about the abundant ferocity of that behemoth (ahem, Heather!) My life actually flashed before my eyes.

I am going to finish the evening learning about p24 & Viron ELISA, hematology, blood chemistry, and PCR as it pertains to human immunodeficiency viral load replication. So here's to a sweet abstract and a trip spectacular new place! All is very well.